Bros Before Hose

by BRODOWN

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credits

released September 16, 2011

Brodown are Pat BroKenna, Lebro Lionheart and Josh Bro'Riley.

All songs written by Brodown, except DK Island Swing by David Wise.

Recorded in two days at Strawbagel Studios by Danny Brickwell.
Several guest vocals by Kev BroKenna, Sammy Christie and Danny Brickwell.

Artwork by Blimpage Design.
Cover photo by Sara Mobarek.

tags

tags: punk Melbourne

license

all rights reserved

about

BRODOWN Melbourne, Australia

Remember that band you're about to love? Brodown do. Because they are that band.

Brodown also have fond memories of all the bands they loved – bands dead and gone, memories begging to be dug up and pissed all over. And boy, do Brodown achieve that.

Energy, passion and fun are what Brodown is made of. They rock short and hard, and then they go to Subway and get a Russian sub. You're invited.
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Track Name: Balls on a Stick
I've got my eyes wide open, but all that I can see
Is a gaping ocean where my balls should be
Whoa, yeah

My balls on a stick, for everyone to see
My balls on a stick, for all eternity

I never meant to make this such a spectacle
All I really wanted was my testicles
Whoa, yeah

On a ship that's taking them far out to sea
To a foreign land where they're a delicacy
Tell me, when in this life will I ever see
My poor balls again? Oh, where could my balls be?
Track Name: Milk is a Marvelous Drink
8AM and I'm ready for breakfast
Don't wanna have a real bad day
There's no food but there's something in the fridge
Everything will be okay

My creamy white mistress is ready to go
I'm gonna drink it all
Gonna skull it cause I can't drink it slow

Milk is a marvelous drink
The best in the world
I think I'm gonna drink it today

Some people say that you can't drink too much
You get sick if you try to chug it all
Give me the bottle cause I can't get enough
Gonna drink till butter comes out my balls

Something has gone wrong
Something has gone off
Something has gone on for way too long

I'm gonna miss ya
Then I'm gonna drink your sister
Track Name: Tops and Bottoms
Tops and bottoms, tops and bottoms

There is a certain type of friend
Who likes to play pretend
But when it comes down to it
You wanna know exactly what they think?
Well simply grab some drinks
And just see if they do it

It's not an exclusive league
So gentlemen now please
Just show some courtesy

There's a rule when you drink beers
You gotta follow it
You gotta say cheers
Before you swallow it
Baby if it's my round
And you only clink my crown
You got a lotta nerve

I can't believe you were brought up so wrong
Listen, it won't take long
Just let me give you some help
A two-step process and it's not that hard
Over before it starts
Don't make a fool of yourself

Where are your manners, son?
I'll show you how it's done
Pass me a fresh cold one

There's a rule when you drink beers
You gotta follow it
You gotta say cheers
Before you swallow it
If I only get one tap
And you pour it down your yap
You got a lotta nerve

There's a rule when you drink beers
You gotta follow it
You gotta say cheers
Before you swallow it
If you don't salute my brew
I'm fucken through with you
You got a lotta nerve
Track Name: Rubik's Cube
Fuck this piece of shit
You cocksucking Skittledick
Suck my hairy balls
Till they shit all over the walls
You are a fucking retard
I fucking hate your guts
Why the fuck won't you work it out
Oh fuck I hate you

Whoa
Fucking Rubik's Cube
Whoa
Ah fuck it, let's get a beer
Track Name: AGB
Pass me another drink
This is gonna be the best night we have ever seen
There's only one thing that scares me
But till then this is gonna be legendary

AGB
AGB
AGB
AGB

Even milk is not so marvelous right now
There's only one way that I'm gonna get this out
I don't like what is happening today
But I would not have it any other way
Track Name: It's Super Effective!
Flamethrower! It's super effective!
Vine Whip! It's super effective!
Wing Attack! It's super effective!
Thunderbolt! It's super effective!
Lick! It's super effective!
Water Gun! It's super effective!
Horn Drill! It's super effective!
Splash!

I've gotta catch them all
I started with Bulbasaur
Just gotta find the cash to buy both Red and Blue
I'll be the master of you

Crabhammer! It's super effective!
Dig! It's super effective!
Hyper Beam! It's super effective!
Penis Pump! It's super effective!
Fire Punch! It's super effective!
Lovely Kiss! It's super effective!
Earthquake! It's super effective!
Flash!

I've gotta catch them all
Except Zubat and Porygon
Just gotta find a friend to trade my Graveler to
I'll be the master of you

I've gotta catch them all
I'll just cheat and get more Master Balls
Just gotta find the cash to buy both Red and Blue
Guess I need Gold and Silver too
And then two Game Boys and a cable
How the fuck do I get Mew?
Only six hundred more until I'll be the master of you

It's super effective!
Track Name: My Baby Left Me for a Garbage Truck
My baby left me for a garbage truck
I went around the world
I tried Tattslotto but I had no luck
And now I sleep in dirt

The teacher told me that I had bad breath
I rented Caddyshack
I had a hamster and I named it Death
And now I'm back in black

They all ignore me when I speak in tongues
I race against machines
I hit the bottom and it wasn't fun
And now my shit is green
Track Name: Dickmobile
Comin' round the corner in my brand new car
Got my fully sick subby and rims
The bass is pumpin', my ears are thumpin'
Gonna get some Maccas for dins
But the boys think it's funny when I go to the dunny
To draw shit all over my car
Now there's cock and balls all over the windows
Fuck those guys, now I'm driving the

Nananananananana, Dickmobile
Nananananananana, Dickmobile
Nananananananana, Dickmobile
Nananananananana, Dickmobile

I rub it out and I start to shout
Those bastards better learn
So I turn around to get in my car
And drive off with a drift u-turn
I look in the rear-view mirror
Those dicks have done it again
Next time I see their cars around
I'm gonna make sure that they are driving the
Track Name: Hey Danny Guess What
You just lost the game
Track Name: The Fresh Prince of Will Smith
Who keeps me company
On those cold, cold nights?
Who tells me what to do
In my sad lovelife?
Who tells me it's alright
When I think I'm insane?
Yeah who rewrites my life?
I don't recall his name

This is a story all 'bout how
My life got flipped, turned upside-down

He's so fresh
Yeah he's our golden boy, forget about the rest
He's so fresh
George Clooney's good, but only one can pass the test
He's so fresh

He's from the wild, wild west
He's got that oldschool charm
He's got amazing strength
And he holds me with both arms
He's the last man alive
Ladies can't keep away
He can't spell happiness
I love him anyway

He's so fresh
Compared to him, old Johnny Depp is second best
He's so fresh
He'd beat Rob Pattinson in a fight to the death
He's so fresh

Nod your head
Black suits comin'
Nod your head
Black suits comin'
Nod your head
Black suits comin'
Nod your head

He's so fresh
I don't care what you say, Big Willy Style's the best
He's so fresh
Straight from the hood onto our screens, now we are blessed
He's so fresh
Track Name: Falling Down an Escalator
You said, "Let's go see a movie.
Let's see the one with wrestling bears"
Although that sounded like the best thing ever
I never should've gone upstairs

How could I know about the danger?
It just felt like a simple sneeze
I didn't know that it would break both my legs
Now would you take a look at me?

I'm falling down an escalator
I'm never gonna stop
Goodbye, my friends, I'll see you later
If I ever reach the top

If I could just have a second
I could probably work this out
But it's so hard to concentrate
When my legs are in my mouth

Every second I'm screaming in pain
I can't explain just how this feels
The doctors say there's nothing they can do
So I'm permanently head over heels